Category Archives: Personal Development

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Reclaiming Your Legacy of Thanksgiving

by Dennis Petersen

reagan-1st-congress-prayerMuch has been researched and written lately about the proven personal benefits of expressing genuine gratitude.  It turns out that thankfulness is not typically a result of being happy, but rather the opposite is true.  People who deliberately and openly confess their thankfulness to others are the happiest of people.  And isn’t it interesting that those who recognize that their lives have a purpose are the ones who are prone to give thanks to their Creator and to those around them.

Have you discovered your purpose?  Do you have a clear reason why you’re excited to get up in the morning?  If you have a mission to drive your daily goals, you’re a much happier person than those who are just being driven by survival mode.

We’re a nation of people that has a centuries-old tradition of celebrating annual solemn days of Thanksgiving.  Yet, it seems that our current generation has almost no concept of the deeply personal conviction of the importance of gratitude.  And it’s pretty obvious that that gratitude should most deservedly be directed to the Almighty Giver of every blessing and perfect gift in our lives.

It seems like everybody is scrambling frantically to demand that their comforts and material desires be accommodated.  How often we see people so ungrateful that complaints and cynical dissatisfaction has become society’s normal?  Things haven’t changed much in 2,000 years have they?

Remember The Sin of Ingratitude in Luke 17:7-19?
Jesus healed ten men of leprosy.  One of them was a Samaritan man.  He was the only one of the ten who came back to Jesus and humbly thanked Him for healing him.  Jesus asked him: “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?”  Sadly, my missionary friend in Africa reports that barely 10% of those they help will bother to express their gratitude with even a word of thanks or a note card.  Gratitude may be rare, but those who express it discover the most enriching lives on earth.  Instead of loneliness, poverty and depression, they are the ones most inclined to be enriched, energized, inspired and transformed

Gratitude goes counter to the ‘victim mentality’ that has deceived so many who think they are entitled to everything at the expense of others in our culture.  When we give thanks sincerely, we acknowledge that we have received a benefit that is unearned.  We can’t help but look beyond ourselves.

When you are stunned with the reality that you survived what could have been a fatal event, how does that make you feel?

After the victory of the Battle of Saratoga during the Revolutionary War, the Continental Congress proclaimed the first National Day of Thanksgiving, November 1, 1777.  How did they express their feeling?  Here’s what they wrote in the proclamation:

“The grateful feeling of their hearts… join the penitent confession of their manifold sins…  that it may please God, through the merits of Jesus Christ, mercifully to forgive and blot them out of remembrance… and… under the providence of Almighty God… secure for these United States the greatest of all human blessings, independence and peace.”

If we want to reclaim our true history, we are going to have to work at telling our children about our real history.  It isn’t being taught in most schools and colleges today.  Thomas Jefferson was the governor of Virginia in 1779.  What did he chose to proclaim for his State after Admiral John Paul Jones captured the British ship HMS Serapis?  The Continental Congress declared a Day of Thanksgiving, which

“Congress… hath thought proper… to recommend to the several States… a day of public and solemn Thanksgiving to Almighty God, for his mercies, and of Prayer, for the continuance of his favour… That He would go forth with our hosts and crown our arms with victory; That He would grant to His church, the plentiful effusions of Divine Grace, and pour out His Holy Spirit on all Ministers of the Gospel; That He would bless and prosper the means of education, and spread the light of Christian knowledge through the remotest corners of the earth… I do therefore… issue this proclamation… appointing… a day of public and solemn Thanksgiving and Prayer to Almighty God… Given under my hand… this 11th day of November, in the year of our Lord, 1779… Thomas Jefferson.”

 

Hear what that same Continental Congress proclaimed after Benedict Arnold’s traitorous plot to betray West Point was thwarted.  It was a Day of Thanksgiving, October 18, 1780:

“In the late remarkable interposition of His watchful providence, in the rescuing the person of our Commander-in-Chief and the army from imminent dangers, at the moment when treason was ripened for execution… it is therefore recommended… a Day of Public Thanksgiving and Prayer… to confess our unworthiness… and to offer fervent supplications to the God of all grace… to cause the knowledge of Christianity to spread over all the earth.”

After British General Cornwallis surrendered at Yorktown, Congress proclaimed a Day of Thanksgiving, October 11, 1782:

“It being the indispensable duty of all nations… to offer up their supplications to Almighty God… the United States in Congress assembled… do hereby recommend it to the inhabitants of these states in general, to observe… the last Thursday… of November next, as a Day of Solemn Thanksgiving to God for all his mercies.”

After the Treaty of Paris ended the Revolutionary War, Congress recommended that the States declare a Day of Thanksgiving.  Massachusetts Governor John Hancock, the former President of the Continental Congress, proclaimed a Day of Thanksgiving, November 8, 1783:

“The Citizens of these United States have every Reason for Praise and Gratitude to the God of their salvation… I do… appoint… the 11th day of December next (the day recommended by the Congress to all the States) to be religiously observed as a Day of Thanksgiving and Prayer, that all the people may then assemble to celebrate… that he hath been pleased to continue to us the Light of the Blessed Gospel… That we also offer up fervent supplications… to cause pure Religion and Virtue to flourish… and to fill the world with His glory.”

After the U.S. Congress passed the First Amendment, it requested President George Washington issue a National Day of Thanksgiving, which he did, October 3, 1789:

“Whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint Committee requested me ‘to recommend to the People of the United States a Day of Public Thanksgiving and Prayer to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness; ‘Now, therefore, I do recommend… Thursday, the 26TH DAY of NOVEMBER … to be devoted by the People of these United States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be… That we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble Thanks… for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government… particularly the national one now lately instituted, for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed… to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue.”

On January 1, 1795, President George Washington proclaimed a Day of Thanksgiving:

“When we review the calamities, which afflict so many other nations… the great degree of internal tranquility we have enjoyed –    the recent confirmation of that tranquility by the suppression of an insurrection which so wantonly threatened it – the happy course of public affairs in general –  the unexampled prosperity of all classes of our citizens; our circumstances which peculiarly mark our situation with indications of the Divine beneficence towards us.  In such a state of things it is, in an especial manner, our duty as people, with devout reverence and affectionate gratitude, to acknowledge our many and great obligations to Almighty God and to implore Him to continue and confirm the blessings we experience…  I, George Washington, President of the United States, do recommend to all religious societies and denominations, and to all persons whomsoever, within the United States,  to set apart…a Day of public Thanksgiving and Prayer: and on that day to meet together and render their sincere and hearty thanks to the great Ruler of Nations.”

 

the-first-prayer-in-congress-september-1774After hearing those inspiring proclamations from national leaders – which, by the way, were entirely inspired by the attitude of profoundly committed preachers in the churches of the American colonies – doesn’t it seem about time that the pastors of our Bible-believing congregations lead the way for reclaiming our lost legacy for the current generation?  Should they not humbly call for days of contrition, repentance and sober thanksgiving?  We have such excellent Biblical and historic precedents to guide our way.

 

Taking God’s Blessings for Granted
Dr. Martin Luther observed: “The greater God’s gifts and works, the less they are regarded.”   It seems that the blessings of life, health, freedom and food are not really appreciated unless they are lost, or threatened. Sunrises and sunsets occur daily so they are taken for granted aren’t they?

Consider the Stars
Ralph Waldo Emerson observed that “If the constellations appeared only once in a thousand years, imagine what an exciting event it would be. But because they are there every night, we barely give them a look.”

The Blessings of Being Hungry and Lonely
Have you noticed that the blessings of rain are barely appreciated unless one has been through a drought?  A hungry man is more thankful for a tiny morsel than most affluent Americans for their table full of choice foods. A lonely woman in a nursing home will appreciate a visit more than a rock star with a crowd of fans. A Christian who has suffered under persecution for decades and receives his first copy of the Holy Scriptures is more thankful for one book than we are for all the Christian books, Bible translations and magazines that overflow our shelves.

You Should Experience Blindness for a Few Days
Helen Keller said: “I have often thought that it would be a blessing if each human being were stricken blind and deaf for a few days for some time during his early adult life. It would make him more appreciative of sight and of the joys of sound.”

A Biblical Command
There are at least 138 passages of Scripture that deal with the subject of thanksgiving. We are commanded: “Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise; give thanks to Him and praise His Name.” Psalm 100:4.

“Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness and for His wonderful works to the children of men!” Psalm 107:8.

“Give thanks to the Father who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the Kingdom of light.” Colossians 1:12.

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” Colossians 3:15.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7.

Joyful, Prayerful and Thankful
“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. Plainly it is God’s will for us to be joyful, prayerful and thankful.

A Sacrifice of Praise
“Therefore, by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His Name.” Hebrews 13:15.

What makes praise a sacrifice?  Could it be that when the blessings we are thankful for have not yet manifested themselves in God’s providence?
A Good Habit
“It ought to be as habitual for us to thank as to ask.” C. H. Spurgeon

The Parent of All Virtues
It has been said that a thankful heart is the parent of all virtues.

What is the Root of Sin?

“The wrath of God is being revealed from Heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness… for although they knew God, they neither glorified Him as God nor gave thanks to Him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.”  Romans 1:18-21.  Look!  The failure to give thanks to God is the root sin that leads to futile thinking and foolish, darkened hearts.  Think about that.

One of the Worst Sins
In 1 Timothy 3:1-5 the apostle Paul gives a list of some of the most terrible sins including: “People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, traitorous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God – having a form of godliness but denying its power.”  Did you see that ungratefulness is listed in the middle of a list of horrible sins?

A Fruit of Character
What’s one of the first lessons good parents teach their children is to say? “Thank You”. It takes character and courage to admit being in debt to others. It is humbling. However, those who cannot admit their indebtedness to others cannot learn, nor can they seek forgiveness.

Maturity
Failure to express gratitude is more than immaturity and rudeness, it is ungodly. We are commanded to honour our parents, our elders and our leaders. It is a sign of maturity to acknowledge indebtedness.  Have you learned anything?  Then you’re in debt to somebody else, aren’t you?  We are all in debt, first, and mostly, to God Himself, for our life, health, food, talents, family, friends, opportunities and for our salvation itself. We are also in debt to past generations who have sacrificed for the freedoms we now enjoy: Reformers, martyrs, pioneers, missionaries, soldiers, parents, teachers, pastors and so many others have sacrificed for our benefit.
An Attitude of Entitlement
Instead of the Christian character of gratitude, our present culture prefers to promote an attitude of entitlement. This is the very opposite of gratitude. It builds on pride and covetousness. It is fuelled by bitterness, greed and envy. All too many in the present humanistic society take things for granted, demand to get, rather than seeking to give.  It is sheer wickedness, and is a sure road to being led astray by all sorts of empty promises and destructive ideas.

An Attitude of Gratitude
A grateful mind is a great mind. “Be thankful, therefore, for the least benefit and thou shalt be worthy to receive greater.” Thomas a Kempis.  Start giving thanks to God and the humblest of servants like your garbage man for the little blessings in life.  Start today to write notes of sincere gratitude to people who have blessed you in any small way.  Ask God to guide your thoughts.  Partner with a friend to hold one another accountable in your new habit of expressing gratitude.

“It is good to give thanks to the Lord and to sing praises to Your Name, O Most High; To declare Your loving kindness in the morning and Your faithfulness every night.” Psalm 92:1-2.

Pride, Ingratitude and Unteachability
Those who do not take advice do not think they have anything to learn. They are often the same people who have a problem expressing a genuine heartfelt gratitude to others. It is a sign of pride to be ungrateful.  It reveals an unwillingness to acknowledge a debt to others.  By God’s grace, when we are humble enough to admit our wrong, He is powerful enough to enable us to change.  We can be a thankful person.

 

Let’s Make this season a Turning Point for expressing Thanks-giving.

List 7 things you are thankful for in your personal life today.

Call 2 people who you can honestly thank for something they contributed to your life.

Privately talk to God about the gratitude you have for His saving grace.

Take 2 minutes to begin pondering the incredible blessings you have to live now.

Promise yourself you will thank the next 10 people you encounter for something they did for you, even if it’s just a common courtesy.

The results of gratitude?

You will become healthier.  Recent studies suggest that gratitude strengthens the immune system, lowers blood pressure, improves sleep quality, and reduces inflammation in the body.  Grateful people are also more inclined to eat better and exercise which obviously increases your wellness.

You will become a more compassionate person.  When you make a routine of expressing gratitude to God and to others for tiny courtesies, you are looking beyond yourself.  You will be kinder.  You will be more forgiving. You will find joy in serving others and be willing to bear others’ burdens without expecting anything in return.

 

When you appreciate what you have, it’s impossible not to share it with others.  On the other hand, you can’t give something away when you’re empty yourself.  When you don’t know how rich you really are, you can’t take delight in sharing little insights with others.  The more aware and thankful we are of the good things in our lives, the more we are able to give to others.

 

Your relationships will deepen.  When you relate more gratefully to others you will draw closer and bond more deeply to the people in your life.  When you express gratitude to the people you love, you become more satisfied with your relationships.  You will reach out to others more easily.  You’ll be more generous.  You’ll be more forgiving and less judgmental.

A grateful heart is more content, more happy no matter what his circumstances are like.  And a happy heart focuses more on the really important joys of peace and little blessings that make life worthwhile.  That’s like a healing ointment to restore your health even when modern medicine can’t do it.

“Give thanks to the Lord, call on His Name; make known among the nations what He has done… Give thanks to the Lord for He is good; His love endures forever.” 1 Chronicles 16:8,34.

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Time to Be like Abraham for Such a Time as This

issachar-understood-the-timesIf ever there was a time when we needed leadership like the sons of Issachar in ancient Israel, it is now.  What was special about the sons of Issachar back in the days of King David, a thousand years before Christ’s time?  We read about them in 1 Chronicles 12:32.  “The sons of Issachar (were) men who understood the times, with knowledge of what Israel should do.”

We may not see any explanation or have any historical knowledge about why these particular men of one of the tribes of Israel (the descendants of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob) were so gifted.  Yet our spiritually minded hearts can’t help but cry out for extraordinary wisdom when we are faced with such overwhelming challenges as a nation of people.  And let’s humbly recognize that just because we are citizens of the kingdom of heaven, our Lord and King of kings, commands us to ‘disciple the nations.’  And frankly, the Bible makes it clear that that is a very big part of the legacy that our Creator wants us to reclaim. (more…)

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Can you expose the top 3 absurd assumptions of evolution?

By Dennis Petersen

geologic chartYou have probably seen evolutionary charts like this… but you might not have seen how to expose the faulty arguments behind them.  Those arguments have deceived many students into thinking the Genesis record is unscientific.  In reality, all a person has to do is ask some logical questions to reveal the utter foolishness of evolutionary assumptions.

You’ve heard educated evolutionists insist that it took a loooooong time… and that it was undirected by a Designer or God so it all happened by random chance… and of course, simple things got more complex  –  that’s evolution in a nutshell isn’t it?

Did you get that?  The 3 absurd assumptions of evolution we’re talking about here are:

Extraordinary Time
Random Chance
Increasing complexity

Don’t forget this key piece of the discussion.

The two major evolutionary fallacies that are required to get us to this point are covered in another chapter or article.  What are they?  They are the absurd answers given by evolutionists to the questions: “how did the universe get here?” and “where did life come from?” You’ve heard those answers I’m sure.  Here they are:

The Big Bang

Spontaneous Generation

And don’t forget the simple questions you can use to reveal the ‘emptiness’ of those two supposed ‘scientific’ causes for the two most significant ‘effects’ that can lead anyone to a realization that there has to be a Creator.

#1 – Did you ever see an explosion cause an increase in the orderliness and complexity of anything?

#2 – Can you even imagine how to put life into chemicals, even if they are cleverly arranged into all the organs and systems of a now-dead corpse?

What’s really at the bottom of evolution teaching?

What is seldom mentioned to unwary and impressionable young students today is that evolutionists believe in bigger miracles than Christians ever dreamed of.  They even admit it on occasion.  And the reason their misguided faith is really nothing less than sheer gullibility is because their miracles had no adequate cause to perform them.  Nature and common sense demonstrate scientifically that any result or ‘effect’ requires an adequate cause.  By definition, the Creator of the universe that exists independent of natural substances is the only adequate “cause” for the universe and life. (more…)

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Who Can You Truly Help?

 

Parachute Mind works when openWhose Lives Can You Influence With Positive Benefits?  Who Are the People You Want To Talk To?

Who Are the Ones Most Open Minded To What You Have To Share With Them?

To everyone who absolutely loves to help other people,

Unless you love ‘beating your head against the wall’ and constantly feeling like you are in the business of ‘convincing’ people against their will, you must finally come to grips with the fact that there are really only a minority of the people out there who are even interested in hearing what you have to say.  Who are they?  You can find them easily because their mind is actually working— and working in their favor..  It kind of reminds you of a parachute… It only works when it’s open!  It’s the open-minded people who are actually willing to discover something that they don’t know and are willing to really admit that they don’t know what they don’t know.

Do you want to know how to spot those who are open-minded?

Open-minded people are constantly excited about their personal discovery of new things.  But more importantly, they’re eager for developing their life.  They’re serious about improving their health.  And they truly want to be better stewards of their resources.  They’re not afraid to be ACTIVE receivers of the blessing of the Apostle John’s wish where he said, “Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.” (3 John 2).

How can a person honestly say they want to receive the goal of that prayer IF they’re unwilling to do their part to adjust their attitudes and behaviors that will enable the desired result to manifest in their own life?

Have you noticed that our society has unfortunately promoted a rather negative and cynical attitude that easily rubs off on many people who are inclined to be more pessimistic than optimistic?

Now I realize that you have to try your best to get along with everybody.  But does that mean you have to ‘spin your wheels’ wasting much of your energy and time with people who really don’t want to better themselves?

There’s an important lesson we need to learn from the Master Teacher, Jesus Christ, who said that you need to “shake the dust off your feet” and move on.  Imagine that.  Even when you’ve got the most life-changing and positive message to give someone, if they don’t receive what you have to say, pack up and find someone who is OPEN.   There’s a reason it says “the humble shall inherit the land and delight in abundant prosperity” – the humble one is the one who knows he doesn’t know it all and is open to hear what you have to say – explore undiscovered realms of life-building insights.

It isn’t a bad idea to start out a conversation with someone and ‘take their temperature’ to see if you’re going to have a short conversation or if they’re someone who you might want to dive a little deeper with.  Try something like: “Hey, I thought of you and wondered if you’re open to see what I’ve been discovering lately.”  If they respond with cynicism, sarcasm or condescension, just tell them, “Oh, that’s okay, did you hear the weather forecast for next week?” and move on to other topics.  Don’t even try to engage their mind.  It’s not working anyway!  Remember the parachute?

On the bright side, don’t let their pessimism wear you down.  Be encouraged with the hope that there really are a lot of people out there who are plenty happy to hear what you have to share with them.  Start asking questions that reflect your honest care for people.  Ask them what would make them happier than they are right now.  Ask them if they’re open to a new idea.  Ask them if they’d like to make a difference in the lives of those they themselves care about.  Ask them if they have taken the course you just learned about on how to …be healthier, …save more of their hard earned money, or …leverage their time to get more done and have more time to do the things they like to do.

With some people, if you’re brave, you might even be able to ask them something like this: “You wanna know what I learned about people that are open?  … Turns out that they are the same people who like to better themselves, improve their health and make more money so they can do more good in the world!”  Then you could follow up with another question like, “Can you think of anybody who thinks like that?” … and laugh with them if they seem to be good natured enough to engage with you.

You might think that everybody wants to solve their problems and find solutions for the things that cause them pain in their life.  But if they really did want that – solutions for their problems – then why aren’t they actively pursuing it?  Sometimes we have to rekindle the hope, inspire the optimism and rebuild the curiosity that makes people want to discover new things.  Just be careful not to ‘cast your pearls before swine’ if you know what I mean.  For an energetic young optimist, that’s one of life’s hardest lessons to learn.  The only ones you can help… really help… are those who really want to be helped.  You ‘gotta wanna’ have the results bad enough to exercise some initiative to get what you want.  And if a person doesn’t respond to you with some energy …some interest …some sincere curiosity, you must not let them drag you into an argument that goes nowhere.

So, don’t forget this one.  It’ll save you a lot of wasted time and energy.  Test the waters.  Ask some good questions to see if they’re open.  Don’t be afraid to taunt them a little bit if you have a good rapport with them.  But don’t ‘show your hand’ too soon.  See if they’re ready to activate their mind.  And when you’re confident that they are ready, just give them a few nibbles to see if they really want more.  Make a plan with them to talk again later and see if you have something that really can help them.  Let the curiosity factor ‘work’ on their subconscious.  That way they’ll be ready to hear you with both ears when you’re with them again.

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10 Transformations that will Redirect your life for the better

Growing Confidence You Are on the Road to Glorifying God by Pursuing Your Purpose

Butterfly transformations

Have you ever gotten ‘fed up’ with the way things are going for you to the point where you finally just said you’ve had it?

Why not take stock today of some things that need to change?

Why not decide today to intentionally work on some personal habits that are guaranteed to make you a happier and more influential person?

Are you willing to Stop the self-destructive things to regain your joy?

  1. Stop making excuses: If you are really serious about reclaiming your legacy then you have to realize that you’re entering the realm where you know good and well that NO EXCUSES ever fly! Why do we come up with excuses? Because they deceive us into thinking they are easier than actually achieving our goals. But excuses are just a waste of time, and we know it.What draws us into a negative path? Rather than growing and working on improving ourselves, we get stuck, lying to ourselves.  We use all kind of excuses.  And 99.9% of those excuses are not even real.2. Stop the blame game: When you blame others for what you don’t have or for what happens to you, you actually give your power away. Life should never be only about what happens to you.  How are you going to handle the situations in your life?  Only you can make the choice to take right actions.

    3. Stop your resistance to change: Change is good. Change will help you make improvements in your life.  Working with change you can also help lives of those around you.  Embrace change – don’t resist it. There is a great book:Who Moved my Cheese by Spencer Johnson – read it!

    4.  Stop complaining: You are the only person responsible for your attitude and your reactions to things! So stop complaining about people – You can’t change them.  Stop complaining about events – they happen to everyone.  Situations can only make you sad, angry and bitter when YOU allow them to. No one wants to be around someone who constantly complains.

    5. Stop trying to impress others: Stop trying so hard to be something or somebody that you’re not… especially if you’re doing it just to make others like you. It doesn’t work anyway. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.  Not all people… of course.  Just the people who you really want to connect with anyway.

    6. Stop being a control freak:  Yeah, sure… I know this is hard, but when you are willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you, miracles seem to happen.  Situations, events, and people – Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – all these things are out of your control.  Admit it.  Just allow them to be.  Your stress level decreases tremendously.

    7. Stop the criticism:  For some of us who tend to be perfectionists this is hard… but there’s wisdom in the old saying: “If you don’t have anything nice to say about someone, don’t say anything at all.”  Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. Everybody wants to be happy.  We all want to love and be loved… and we all want to be understood.  So why not practice the habit of highly effective people that Stephen Covey talks about in his book: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

    8: Stop Judging: Stop judging people, things and events just because you don’t understand them. Just because something seems “weird” or different does not mean it is bad or wrong.  If you need to help your kids understand good judgment in a discussion that’s fine, but you don’t need to get into a personal ‘issue’ over what you disagree about.  Let God judge them.  Let go of it and let God handle it.

    9: Stop with the need to always be right: There are too many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right.  We do this even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be happy?”

    10. Stop trying to live your life up to other people’s expectations: Way too many of us are living a life that is not true to our own personal calling and purpose.  When we try to live our life according to what others think is best for us, we develop all sorts of inner tension and frustration. Some people spend their whole life trying to live according to what their parents think is best for them.  What a shame to allow what your friends, or even your enemies think is best for you to control your decisions!  For way too many men and women, the popular media has projected a false reality that they try to live out.

Don’t ignore the inner voice of conscience and the inspiration of your Creator to guide you.

Remember “Desire” and “inspire.”   Remember your inner calling. We are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that we lose control over our lives and forget what makes us happy, what we really want, what we really need.  We all have just one life to live. Own it.  Don’t let other people’s opinions mislead you.

I can honestly share with you, since I have made a conscious effort to stop all of the behaviors above, I have never been happier. And when I see myself slip – I acknowledge that behavior and work on adjusting my thought process.

Remember we cannot change, fix and improve on what we have not yet acknowledged.

So if you need it (and who doesn’t?), find an accountability partner who has your permission to call you out when you slip. This way you can reflect on what made you say or act in a certain way. The more aware you are of your actions, the easier and faster you can improve them.

What are you passionate about?

What drives you to put your feet on the floor before dawn every morning?  Some pious person might say: “just doing God’s will” or “living for Jesus” or some trite saying that is so vague and evasive that it really doesn’t give anybody a clear picture or roadmap of what is truly the passion that guides your agenda.

Some might say that “I just aim to please my boss” … or “serve my customers” … or “be faithful in doing my job” … but what are you passionate about?

May I tell you what I’m passionate about?  I’m passionate about changing lives… about helping others discover the best ways of reaching their goals, accomplishing their purpose, fulfilling the purposes they were created for and enjoying every day life.  And that encompasses a lot of things… things like: discovering insights, finding better ways of doing things, and applying practical solutions to life’s challenges.

In the hectic pace of modern living today, it’s common for us to be so busy doing all the things that we have to do that we don’t have the time to search out the best solutions to many of our deepest challenges.  Unless I’m a fatalist, when I stop to realize what’s going on, it hits me that nearly all the problems, heartaches and difficulties common to mankind are explained by one ageless principal.  Once I discovered it tucked away in the writing of a well known ancient Hebrew king, I began to see that everything in life is part of our Creator’s blueprint for us to fulfill our purpose.

Ecclesiastes 2:24 “There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and that he should make his soul enjoy good in his labor. This also I saw, that it was from the hand of God.”

You don’t need to stumble and fall into confusion about choices. Why not just do something?

1Corinthians 10:31 “Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

It’s vitally important for the believer to have confidence that what he is doing is blessed or at least sanctioned by the overarching truth of God’s providential will.

Deuteronomy 8:18 “But you shall remember the LORD your God, for it is He who is giving you power to make wealth, that He may confirm His covenant which He swore to your fathers, as it is this day.

3 John 1:2 Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.

 

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Are you ready to Make this the day that your life will change for good?

changeAheadAdapted by Dennis Petersen from an article by Chris Widener

 

How many people do you know who wish for a better life but never seem to do much to change it?  It seems to be natural for almost everybody to desire a better life.  But is their desire matched with effort to do anything about it?

 

No matter where we are in life we tend to at least have fleeting dreams of a better place.  I suppose some would think that is a good quality, but is it really?

 

It might seem good to have a dream that we can see far off of a better situation for us, our families and our businesses and communities.  But is this really a good mindset to maintain?

 

  What good is a dream if it is not progressing toward reality?

 

A lot of people give up dreaming for this very reason… There is no progress in reality toward the dream.  A dream can make you feel good, but long term, if you don’t actively pursue it and make it a reality, the dream will cause you more frustration than anything.

 

But there is a good reason to have hope!  I’m talking about the day your life really changes…the day that your dream starts to become a reality, and not some pie-in-the-sky wish. Imagine a day that literally turns your life around for you – a day that things begin to get better and you begin to fulfill your purpose, your mission and your destiny!

 

When is this day?

 

It’s the day you make a decision!  It’s the day you say “enough is enough; I’ve had it.”  When will you get serious about changing your future?

 

The simplest key to changing your life is to make a decision, and then to act upon it. Once you start taking action and follow-through consistently until your dream becomes a reality… THAT is the day when your decision is etched on your doorpost to face you every day from now on.  Life will begin to change for you.

 

So the decision is the key? Yes, it is. Every dream begins as a thought. What is yours?  You might have to start with the reality that you were born to be a producer… to be productive… to be more than you are now by applying your desire to your circumstances and look for opportunities to make the money it takes to reach the things you dream about.  Yes, that’s right… it takes money and money is yours to create as you find ways to provide value for others around you.

 

What’s it going to take?

 

But you know right well that to have the financial independence to accomplish the dreams you have is going to take more than ‘making a living.’  So why not work in your part time hours to create the means to allow you to have money working for you rather than you being a slave to money?

 

You may as well face the reality that to do that you have to learn to master your time and your skills so you can OWN your own business.  And that doesn’t mean that you have to be a slave to a business that really ‘owns’ you.  Why not find out how to take control of being a producer that is using the right tools to create wealth?

 

You say: “I would love to have my own business.  I’d love to be free to run my life and earn as much money as I want so I can go where I want and help others as I truly want and experience a full life of being more of what I was created to accomplish.  Sounds like a good dream wouldn’t you say?  It’s probably a dream that a lot of people have and may be afraid to say for fear of being put down. But just because you have a little electrical impulse bouncing around inside your head, does that do you any good?

 

Dreams have value when you convert them to Action

 

The dream only has genuine value to you or others if it is translated into action!  And it only takes on action if we make a decision to form a ‘blueprint’ or ‘map’ of action.

 

Let’s sort out a simple plan.  What are the decisions to be made here?  Well, one might be to quit wasting your off-work hours on activities that are not investing in your future.  I’m not suggesting you quit your job.  Not yet.  But you do need to realize that you are in business for yourself and your job (if you are employed or if you own a small business) is part of your ‘roadmap’ to your future.  Another part of your roadmap is how you decide to invest some time into building systems that will allow you to have financial freedom.

 

Systems Create Leverage So You Can Have Freedom

 

Once you have built up a profitable part time business that truly leverages your time by using proven business systems to expand your prosperity so you are producing more than just ‘a living’ then maybe you will consider quitting your job.  But in the meantime, figure out how to make your expenses match the income from your job.  If you are determined to eliminate the things that waste your private time and invest 10 to 20 hours a week into a proven business system with a trustworthy business team, then it won’t be long before you will create a vision for goals that can accomplish your dreams.  Of course you must be coachable and self controlled with your new and increasing extra income.  You will start thinking like a successful owner of “You, Inc.”

 

New Disciplines or Pipe Dreams – your choice

 

As you learn more about how to grow your business, you will discover new disciplines that produce new rewards.  You will have to decide what you must do to make your dream a reality.  You must make better choices of how you spend your time, who you spend your time with and what you feed your mind.  Then you must act upon those decisions. If you do not act, your dream remains nothing more than a pipe dream – a non-reality.

 

When you have acted, you must follow through. Continue to follow your plan, day by day, moving your dream to fulfillment. Here is a practical exercise to get you moving:

  • What is your dream? It could be in any area of life: Work, family, finances, health etc.
  • What is a decision you have to make to get yourself MOVING in the right direction? This should be action–oriented, not philosophical in nature. For example, it should be “I am going to invest the time and resources needed to start my new business on March 1st,” not “I’ve decided that being in business for myself would be more fulfilling.” That is an idea, not a decision.
  • Next, pick a day you are going to do it. Pick a time. Be specific.
  • Next, do it! Commit to your business mentor that you will do what it takes and stay accountable.
  • Next, begin the process of continually following through.
  • Next, enjoy yourself; you are pursuing your dream! It may be hard, but it will also be the most fulfilling and rewarding time of your life!

 

“The history of free men is not written by chance, but by choice; their choice.” Dwight D. Eisenhower

 

Decide, act and follow through. The day you do will be the day you change your life for good!

 

“the hand of the diligent makes rich.” Prov.10:4

 

“make it your ambition to lead a quiet life…(at) your own business…work(ing) with your own hands.” 1 Thes.4:11

 

 

Bonus

 

12 Success Factors to Insist on When Choosing a Home Business

 

In my experience and after researching dozens of different types of home businesses myself, it is clear that everyone wants to avoid a wild goose chase.  There are some key success factors that are critical for long term success. Every one of these factors is just as important as the next.

 

Here’s a good question to ask any serious business person:  “Do you agree that the ideal business is one that keeps customers coming back and that does not require your personal handling of all future transactions?”  That’s what creates ongoing ‘passive’ income, right?

 

Many people are familiar with the “80 – 20 rule.”  You know what that is I’m sure.  20% of the people (or less) create 80% of the success or results in just about anything.  A good question to ask is: “What if you could have a business where even the 80% (of people who are your customers and business partners) are so delighted with their participation with you that they count their success, even as customers using your products, as adequate reason to continue doing business with you?”

When it’s appropriate to talk with a business person (who could be your potential partner) about the search that many people are doing right now to find a reliable business opportunity, they will appreciate having this list of Success Factors.   The logical question to ask next, after a thoughtful review of these 12 points, is my question at the end.

  1. Company track record – How long has the company you’re considering representing been in business? What are the company’s annual sales statistics each year since in business? Does the company print average income statistics for business builders? It should and you should ask for them. Proof of long term sales, success and growth is critical in choosing any business.

  2. Financially sound – Does the company have outstanding debt? Joining a company that is debt free is something I highly recommend to lessen any risk to you.

  3. Strong management team – What are the backgrounds and credentials of the management team? You want to join a company that is run with integrity and strong leadership.

  4. Unique consumable products – Are the products of the company products that people actually need, use, run out of and repurchase month after month? Do the products have any trademarks or patents allowing for exclusive rights (meaning no other company can copy them)? If the products are not consumable, meaning something that a person would only buy once, then that is a business that will not be viable long term. If the products are consumable, however not necessarily a need, that will reduce your chance for long term success. Products needed and consumed monthly make for a solid business model.

  5. Wide market appeal – Are the products something everyone needs and uses? If the products are specific for a certain gender, age group or body size for example, you reduce your market potential.  It is not something for everyone.

  6. Competitive prices – Are the products comparable in price or less expensive than the competition? If they are too expensive this is not a business that will produce great results.

  7. High customer reorder rate – Does the company share it’s reorder rate? Meaning how many customers that purchased from the company last month, reorder again the following month? If the re-order rate is low, the business will not be viable as new customers simply replace your old customers producing no real growth or a secure, residual income.

  8. Low initial investment – If the cost to join or start your business is too high it makes for more risk and difficulty in attracting customers and business partners. If a start up fee is high and a ‘customer acquisition bonus’ is also high, beware of what might be a ponzi scheme.

  9. Low monthly requirement – If there is a high monthly requirement, customers/business builders may end up with an inventory or products they do not need. If there is a low monthly product purchase requirement, then customers are getting what they need for personal use each month, and from a business standpoint you know customers are purchasing each month which creates the freedom of true residual income.

  10. Rewards for leadership development – Does the company reward you for helping others in your business succeed? If there is any way the company could remove business builders from your business because of their success, be very careful about joining. There should never be potential for you to lose great partners.

  11. Risk-free – Is everything 100% guaranteed? If not, could you seriously advise someone to join you?

  12. Anyone can be successful – Is the business plan set up for anyone to be successful at any time? If it’s a company that says “Ground floor” opportunity, or “Get in Now”, be very wary. If only the people who join at the beginning can be successful, then eventually people will get hurt.

 

The only real question after considering this list is this: “which one of these factors would you take off the list if you were going to seriously consider working with the company?”

If anyone seeing this list knows someone they care about is considering working with a company as an independent representative, they might be wise to consider: “how does that company measure up?”  If we are honest with ourselves, nothing can match the conviction of ‘certainty’ that is backed up by verifiable data and experience.  All the above points are relevant particularly to the one who has a long term commitment in mind.  That’s why we should be just as eager to ‘prove all things’ in this part of life as we should be in any other.

If you’re serious about making some changes in your own future, I’ll be glad to direct you to some websites that will help you even more. Start by getting further insights I’ve prepared about the 12 success factors that your home based business must have to succeed and grow.  You will find it at this link.  Click here.

 

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Curiosity-Key to Influencing People & Who Can you truly help?

Galileo discover truth quoteWhat is the key to truly influencing people?  And who can you really help?

Have you heard what Galileo Galilei, the father of modern science, said about this?

“We cannot teach people anything; we can only help them discover it within themselves.”

He’s right.  If we want to make a difference in people’s lives we have to get their attention enough so that they will really want to ‘buy into’ what we have to share.  You have to find out what arouses their curiosity.

Curiosity is an important trait of a genius. I don’t think you can find an intellectual giant who is not a curious person. Thomas Edison, Leonardo da Vinci, Albert Einstein—they were all curious.  They were all genius.  And if we’re honest we eventually realize that every human has some element of genius in their makeup, begging to be activated.  What is the curiosity ‘ticket’ that will cause another human to engage with you on whatever it is you would like to influence them about?  What will make them actually want to draw out from you the discoveries that you have made?

“The important thing is not to stop questioning… Never lose a holy curiosity.”

Albert Einstein

 

Why is Curiosity Important and How can we Develop It?

Let’s look at four reasons.

1.. It makes your mind active instead of passive.

Curious people always ask questions and search for answers in their minds. Their minds are always active. Since the mind is like a muscle which becomes stronger through continual exercise, the mental exercise caused by curiosity makes your mind stronger and stronger.  Curiosity really does require some energy.  You have to put yourself into it.

2.. It makes your mind observant of new ideas.

When you are curious about something, your mind expects and anticipates new ideas related to it. When the ideas come they will soon be recognized. Without curiosity, the ideas may pass right by you and you’ll miss them entirely because your mind is not prepared to recognize them.  Just think, how many great ideas you may have lost due to lack of curiosity?

3.. It opens up new worlds and possibilities.

By being curious you will be able to see new worlds and possibilities which are normally not visible. They are hidden behind the surface of normal life, and it takes a curious mind to look beneath the surface and discover these new worlds and possibilities.  There are possibilities just waiting to make a huge difference in your life TODAY.  Just think.  You’re one person, one greeting, one meeting away from having a totally different life.  If you’ll be curious enough in your daily coming and going, you’ll anticipate an exciting new adventure every day.  Who is the Lord going to bring across your path today?  What new bit of information you discover today is going to revolutionize your life forever?

4.. It brings excitement into your life.

The life of curious people is far from boring. It’s neither dull nor routine. There are always new things that attract their attention.  There are always new ‘toys’ to play with.  Instead of being bored, curious people have an adventurous life.

There’s a lot going for being curious, isn’t there?

 

Who Can You Truly Help?

Whose lives can you influence with positive benefits?  Who are the people you want to talk to?  Who are the ones most open minded to what you have to share with them?

To everyone who absolutely loves to help other people – unless you love ‘beating your head against the wall’ and constantly feeling like you are in the business of ‘convincing’ people against their will – you must finally come to grips with the fact that there are really only a minority of the people out there who are even interested in hearing what you have to say.  Who are they?  You can find them easily because their mind is actually working— and working in their favor.  It kind of reminds you of a parachute… It only works when it’s open!  It’s the open-minded people who are actually willing to discover something that they don’t know and are willing to really admit that they don’t know what they don’t know.

Open minded people are curious people. They are the ones who discover new things that are life-changing.  Do you want to know how to spot those who are open-minded?

Open-minded people are constantly excited about their personal discovery of new things.  But more importantly, they’re eager for developing their life.  They’re serious about improving their health.  And they truly want to be better stewards of their resources.  They’re not afraid to be ACTIVE receivers of the blessing of the Apostle John’s wish where he said, “Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.” (3 John 2).  That’s a ‘multi-dimensional’ objective.  It includes your soul, your body, your physical situation… it’s our life.

How can a person honestly say they want to receive the goal of that prayer IF they’re unwilling to do their part to adjust their attitudes and behaviors that will enable the desired result to manifest in their own life?

Have you noticed that our society has unfortunately promoted a rather negative and cynical attitude that easily rubs off on many people who are inclined to be more pessimistic than optimistic?

Now I realize that you have to try your best to get along with everybody.  But does that mean you have to ‘spin your wheels’ wasting much of your energy and time with people who really don’t want to better themselves?

Identify the humble-hearted

There’s an important lesson we need to learn from the Master Teacher, Jesus Christ, who said that you need to “shake the dust off your feet” and move on.  Imagine that.  Even when you’ve got the most life-changing and positive message to give someone, if they don’t receive what you have to say, pack up and find someone who is OPEN.   There’s a reason it says “the humble shall inherit the land and delight in abundant prosperity” – the humble one is the one who knows he doesn’t know it all and is open to hear what you have to say – explore undiscovered realms of life-building insights.  That’s what the humble person wants to do.  I hope that is YOU.  Are you willing to discover new things?  Things that you don’t know that you don’t know?

It isn’t a bad idea to start out a conversation with someone and ‘take their temperature’ to see if you’re going to have a short conversation or if they’re someone who you might want to dive a little deeper with.  Try something like: “Hey, I thought of you and wondered if you’re open to see what I’ve been discovering lately.”  If they respond with cynicism, sarcasm or condescension, just tell them, “Oh, that’s okay, did you hear the weather forecast for next week?” and move on to other topics.  Don’t even try to engage their mind.  It’s not working anyway!  Remember the parachute?

 

Questions that Naturally open their minds

On the bright side, don’t let their pessimism wear you down.  Be encouraged with the hope that there really are a lot of people out there who are plenty happy to hear what you have to share with them.  Start asking questions that reflect your honest care for people.  Ask them what would make them happier than they are right now.  Ask them if they’re open to a new idea.  Ask them if they’d like to make a difference in the lives of those they themselves care about.  Ask them if they have taken the course you just learned about on how to …be healthier, …save more of their hard earned money, or …leverage their time to get more done and have more time to do the things they like to do.  Ask people if they would be open to talk with you about your new discovery.

With some people, if you’re brave, you might even be able to ask them, “You wanna know what I learned about people that are open?  … Turns out that they are the same people who like to better themselves, improve their health and make more money so they can do more good in the world!”  Then you could follow up with another question like, “Can you think of anybody who thinks like that?” … and laugh with them if they seem to be good natured enough to engage with you.  Just dialog.  Help them get intrigued and curious about your new ideas that you’d like to influence them about.

You might think that everybody wants to solve their problems and find solutions for the things that cause them pain in their life.  But think about that.  If they really did want that – solutions for their problems – then why aren’t they actively pursuing it?  How often do you find even yourself in the same old ‘rut,’ doing the same old actions, and getting the same old results?  Doesn’t that seem like what Albert Einstein defined as ‘insanity?’  Unfortunately, that is where all too many of us are today.

A major lesson of life

Sometimes we have to rekindle the hope, inspire the optimism and rebuild the curiosity that makes people want to discover new things.  Just be careful not to ‘cast your pearls before swine’ if you know what I mean.  For an energetic young optimist, that’s one of life’s hardest lessons to learn.  The only ones you can help… really help… are those who really want to be helped.  You ‘gotta wanna’ have the results bad enough to exercise some initiative to get what you want.  And if a person doesn’t respond to you with some energy …some interest …some sincere curiosity, you must not let them drag you into an argument that goes nowhere.  Your time is to valuable for that.

So, don’t forget this one.  It’ll save you a lot of wasted time and energy.  Test the waters.  Ask some good questions to see if they’re open.  Don’t be afraid to taunt them a little bit if you have a good rapport with them.  But don’t ‘show your hand’ too soon.  See if they’re ready to activate their mind.  And when you’re confident that they are ready, just give them a few nibbles to see if they really want more.  Make a plan with them to talk again later and see if you have something that really can help them.  Let the curiosity factor ‘work’ on their subconscious.  That way they’ll be ready to hear you with both ears when you’re with them again.

Be sure you have some good reasons for the person you’re wanting to influence to continue their interaction with you.  Don’t give them the whole ‘truckload’ of information that’s on your mind in your first dialog.  Help them establish curiosity to hear more from you at another time.

 

Now, knowing the importance of curiosity, here are some tips to develop it.

  1. Keep an open mind

This is essential if you are to have a curious mind. Be open to learn, relearn, and unlearn. Some things you know and believe might be wrong, and you should be prepared to accept this possibility and change your mind.  Some of the opinion and ideas we grew up thinking and believing are just simply wrong, inaccurate or downright untrue.  That’s why the Bible urges us to “test all things.”  Hold fast what is true.

  1. Don’t take things for granted

If you just accept the world as it is without trying to dig deeper, you will certainly lose the ‘holy curiosity’. Never take things for granted. Try to dig deeper beneath the surface of what is around you.

  1. Ask questions relentlessly

A sure way to dig deeper beneath the surface is asking questions: What is that? Why is it made that way? When was it made? Who invented it? Where does it come from? How does it work? What, why, when, who, where, and how are the best friends of curious people.

  1. Don’t label something as boring

Whenever you label something as boring, you close one more door of possibilities. Curious people are unlikely to call something as boring. Instead, they always see it as a door to an exciting new world. Even if they don’t yet have time to explore it, they will leave the door open to be visited another time.

  1. See learning as something fun

If you see learning as a burden, there’s no way you will want to dig deeper into anything. That will just make the burden heavier. But if you think of learning as something fun, exciting and adventuresome, you will naturally want to dig deeper. So look at life through the glasses of fun and excitement and enjoy the learning process.  Who knows what discoveries lie ahead that you never thought of before?

  1. Read diverse kinds of reading

Don’t spend too much time on just one world; take a look at another world.  It will introduce you to the possibilities and excitement of the other worlds which may spark your interest to explore them further. One easy way to do this is through reading diverse kinds of reading. Try to pick a book or magazine on a new subject and let it feed your mind with the excitement of a new world.  As a believer and follower of Christ, why not ask God, “guide me into good, wholesome and productive things that will make a difference, not only in my life, but in the lives of others whom I touch.

When you do that there’s no telling all the benefits, the development and the character enrichment that will go on in your life, not to mention the ability to influence others in positive ways.  You’re going to make a difference to see some changes in your life in the very near future, as you wait on God to bring experiences into your life.  But make sure you actively pursue them.  Don’t just sit there.  Take action.  Take the course.  Read the book.  Step out of your comfort zone.  Talk to somebody.  Go to a meeting.  Attend a new special event.  When you do, your life will change.

 

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10 Decisions that will transform your life to make you truly happy

Have you ever gotten ‘fed up’ with the way things are going for you to the point where you finally just said you’ve had it?

Why not take stock today of some things that need to change?

Why not decide today to intentionally work on some personal habits that are guaranteed to make you a happier person?

Are you willing to Stop the self-destructive things to regain your joy?
1. Stop making excuses: If you are really serious about reclaiming your legacy then you have to realize that you’re entering the realm where you know good and well that NO EXCUSES ever fly! Why do we come up with excuses? Because they deceive us into thinking they are easier than actually achieving our goals. But excuses are just a waste of time, and we know it.

What draws us into a negative path? Rather than growing and working on improving ourselves, we get stuck, lying to ourselves.  We use all kind of excuses.  And 99.9% of those excuses are not even real.

2. Stop the blame game: When you blame others for what you don’t have or for what happens to you, you actually give your power away. Life should never be only about what happens to you.  How are you going to handle the situations in your life?  Only you can make the choice to take right actions.

3. Stop your resistance to change: Change is good. Change will help you make improvements in your life.  Working with change you can also help lives of those around you.  Embrace change – don’t resist it. There is a great book:Who Moved my Cheese by Spencer Johnson – read it!

4.  Stop complaining: You are the only person responsible for your attitude and your reactions to things! So stop complaining about people – You can’t change them.  Stop complaining about events – they happen to everyone.  Situations can only make you sad, angry and bitter when YOU allow them to. No one wants to be around someone who constantly complains.

5. Stop trying to impress others: Stop trying so hard to be something or somebody that you’re not… especially if you’re doing it just to make others like you. It doesn’t work anyway. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.  Not all people… of course.  Just the people who you really want to connect with anyway.

6. Stop being a control freak:  Yeah, sure… I know this is hard, but when you are willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you, miracles seem to happen.  Situations, events, and people – Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – all these things are out of your control.  Admit it.  Just allow them to be.  Your stress level decreases tremendously.

7. Stop the criticism:  For some of us who tend to be perfectionists this is hard… but there’s wisdom in the old saying: “If you don’t have anything nice to say about someone, don’t say anything at all.”  Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. Everybody wants to be happy.  We all want to love and be loved… and we all want to be understood.  So why not practice the habit of highly effective people that Stephen Covey talks about in his book: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

8: Stop Judging: Stop judging people, things and events just because you don’t understand them. Just because something seems “weird” or different does not mean it is bad or wrong.  If you need to help your kids understand good judgment in a discussion that’s fine, but you don’t need to get into a personal ‘issue’ over what you disagree about.  Let God judge them.  Let go of it and let God handle it.

9: Stop with the need to always be right: There are too many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right.  We do this even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be happy?”

10. Stop trying to live your life up to other people’s expectations: Way too many of us are living a life that is not true to our own personal calling and purpose.  When we try to live our life according to what others think is best for us, we develop all sorts of inner tension and frustration. Some people spend their whole life trying to live according to what their parents think is best for them.  What a shame to allow what your friends, or even your enemies think is best for you to control your decisions!  For way too many men and women, the popular media has projected a false reality that they try to live out.

Don’t ignore the inner voice of conscience and the inspiration of your Creator to guide you.  Remember “Desire” and “inspire.”   Remember your inner calling. We are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that we lose control over our lives and forget what makes us happy, what we really want, what we really need.  We all have just one life to live. Own it.  Don’t let other people’s opinions mislead you.

I can honestly share with you, since I have made a conscious effort to stop all of the behaviors above, I have never been happier. And when I see myself slip – I acknowledge that behavior and work on adjusting my thought process.

Remember we cannot change, fix and improve on what we have not yet acknowledged.

So if you need it (and who doesn’t?), find an accountability partner who has your permission to call you out when you slip. This way you can reflect on what made you say or act in a certain way. The more aware you are of your actions, the easier and faster you can improve them.

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Let’s Teach our Kids the Ant Philosophy

By Dennis Petersen

 

I heard about how Jim Rohn, the well-known business trainer, taught about a very simple yet powerful concept – the ant philosophy.  The Bible teaches the wisdom of observing the humble ant and learning her ways.  Maybe we should all talk with each other from time to time about the characteristic of ants that should apply to our own lives as humans.

Do we value success?  Survival?  Community?  Progress?  Accomplishment?  Overcoming obstacles?  Endurance?  Resourcefulness?

What other values can you think of and why everybody should study ants?

Consider the simplicity of Four Basic Principles seen in the behavior of ants.

Principle Number One: ants never quit.

Can you think of some advantages of this kind of attitude?

If ants are going somewhere and you try to stop them; they’ll find another way, won’t they?  Working together or all alone, have you noticed that ants are determined to do whatever it takes to get where they want to go?  They’ll climb over, they’ll climb under, and they’ll climb around.  Nothing seems to stand in their way of finding the solution to every barricade you can throw at them.  They will find another way. Count on it.

Not a bad core value if you’re an ant or a person with a passion for living… is it?  Do you reckon this kind of persistence is worth brushing off and determining for yourself?  Never quit looking for a way to get where you’re supposed to go.

Principle Number Two: ants think winter all summer.

Now here’s a pretty energizing perspective.

You can’t be so naive to think summer will last forever.

Comfortable climate is no time to relax.  You know winter is coming.  The question is, “are you committed to do what it takes?”  Are you committed to the discipline of preparation?  Working hard in the summers of life will keep you from starving in the slow going winters when resources are sparse and conditions are more challenging.

Resist the temptation to join the partiers in their carefree summer flings.  Take some time for refreshment and pleasure but be careful not to overdo it.  Summer is no time to kick back.  The ants are showing us the way if we’ll only pay attention.

Be reminded that summertime can fool you.  If you’re not thinking ahead you’ll forget that “this doesn’t last.”  Be careful where and how you build your house, your business or your project in the summer when life is going fine.  Think how the landscape around you will look when the storms are upon you.  Be realistic. In the summer, you’ve got to think storm. You’ve got to think rocks as you enjoy the sand and sun. Think ahead.

Principle Number Three: ants think summer all winter.

That too is so important.

During the winter, when it’s cold and windy and wet, when you can hardly leave your cozy corner, you’ve got to remind yourself, “This won’t last long; we’ll soon be out of here.”  Do you think this attitude just might keep us hopeful?

And look what happens when the storm and cold lifts.  When things start warming up on an early day in springtime, the ants are out. If it turns cold again, they’ll dive back down,

but then they come out as soon as the sun rises on a nice warm new day. They can’t wait to get out.

And here’s the last part of the ant philosophy:

Principle Number Four

 — How much will an ant gather during the summer to prepare for the winter?

All he possibly can. What a wonderfully ambitious perspective,

the “all-you-possibly-can” philosophy.

Can you seriously take that mindset and make it your own?

In just about anything you undertake, why not have the attitude that you’re going to DO all you possibly can, ACCOMPLISH all you possibly can, PRODUCE all you possibly can, EARN all you possibly can, SELL all you possibly can, INFLUENCE all you possibly can… in short… whatever opportunities life hands you you’re going to do like scripture says and make the most of every opportunity because the daylight is briefer than you think.  Before you know it, the night time comes when you can’t do much work.

Wow, maybe that is the makings for a great seminar to put on and invite everyone to attend – the ant seminar.  Think of it:  Never give up; Look ahead; Stay positive and Do all you can.